( In which Snape breaks into tears and begs Dumbledore to take him, whereupon they have touching, gentle sex. ...Uh, is it just me, or have I seen this before? )

Yes, it's...
Spork of Dark Eyes

Naturally, I am compelled to spork this fic. (I apologize in advance to any Snape/Dumbledore shippers on my f-list about what Snape says in this spork. Err… I wanted to keep Snape IC? ^_^;;)

Our sporkers!

Albus Dumbledore himself, of course (as a teenager)!

Hello.

His CANON boyfriend, Gellert Grindelwald!

( Read more... )

I CAN USE FONT COLORS FOR SPORKERS AGAIN YAY
Abby, who's she?
That, Ariana, is -
I didn't ask you.
The spork captain, whatever her name is.
Oh.
Harry.... that would be The Quidditch-Playing Idiot Who Saved The Wizarding World From A Raving Madman Who Turned Himself Into A Snake, ja? And Draco... the pretender to the title of Hogwarts' well-groomed, ( Read more... )

As, err, detox from a recent [Edit: at the time] parody, I’m throwing dear Albus Dumbledore and Gellert Grindelwald into a spork of everyone’s favorite badfic.

…I think I need a saner definition of “detox”.

( Portions of spork may be choppy due to only working on this intermittently. My apologies. :D;; )

Disclaimer: JKR owns all of Harry Potter. I merely [semi-fondly] mock.
Edit: ...Good grief, post-teenage!Albus IS really the King of Failure, isn't he? There's not a single 'success' of his that isn't more along the lines of 'semi-successful attempt to clean up part of a mess I made' or 'dumb luck which I shall do my best to take credit for', is ( Read more... )

DH Read-through/Rants, Chapter 6

The Ghoul in Pajamas

Also known as, In Which Molly Weasley is clearly Declared for Dark, Arthur Weasley has switched IQs with Crabbe, and I realize the ONE thing that could make me spit on HP canon and stomp off to the Sacrifices Arc.

Disclaimer: The jokes about Molly are all tongue-in-cheek, all right? Don’t ( Read more... )

Oh, ALL RIGHT. This is it.

I’m sorry, but I couldn’t let a wimpy!emo!Albus Dumbledore go un-avenged, so I’m re-sporking Chapter 7 of Child of Grace. Apologies to Das Mervin. (I mean, yes, he gets kind of emo in King’s Cross, but at least it’s a “…Uh, Harry, you are going to pat me on the back and tell me I’m all right, won’t you?” sort of emo ( Read more... )

Woo-hoo! And the second part of my current LMM spork section... which will be all for a while, because I have the 3rd chapter of Haunted to get done (since Mervin's finished Chapter 4), I signed up for Chapter 14 of The-Fic-That-Must-Not-Be-Named-Due-to-Heidipatrol, and I have three midterms coming up next week. Heh heh... (D

I blinked again and ( Read more... )

*checks watch* The new sporkers should be here any moment now…

Hello, Muggles! All your base are belong to us! *maniacal laugh*

…Ahem. In more erudite terms, we are taking over your “sporking organization” For The Greater Good.

Er-HEM, boys. I am the spork captain, you are the minions, and you’re just here for a quick visit anyway. Besides ( Read more... )